Recently a Justice and Law Committee from the District Government visited the Gulu Remand Home. Their findings mandated that the boys and girls of the juvenile detention center participate in 5 key on-going activities: Indoor and outdoor sports, Counseling, Life skills training, Dialogue and reconciliation with parents/guardians, and Literacy. We are proud that The Recreation Project provides the first 4 out of 5 activities.
This week we brought the children of the Remand Home with their parents/guardians. We were excited to see that 15 parents/guardians showed up!
We did several exercises geared toward getting the parents and children to talk about barriers in communication at home. We used an activity called “Eyes, Voice, Body” to present the challenge of clear communication and potential for misunderstanding. Here are a few comments from the debriefing session:
To the parents: What do you think makes it difficult for children to communicate with their parents?
Parent: Some of we parents over-drink and it becomes very difficult for them to talk with us when we’re drunk.
Parent: Many parents aren’t concerned with their children—they are only concerned with their work and finding money.
To the Children: What do you think makes it difficult for parents to communicate with their children?
Child: Many children are upset with their parents because parents have ideas about how their children’s life should go. For example, many parents decide that their daughters should go and get married-even when the girl is still a child. For boys, some parents push them out of the house when they are still young. We don’t want parents to just tell us what to do, but they don’t like talking to us about what we like.
What makes it easy to communicate?
Parent: It’s important to earn trust before communication can be successful. Our families are often full of mistrust and that’s a problem.
Child: we kids need to be loved by our parents before we can talk openly to them. Our parents often don’t show love towards us. That’s why we usually talk about important issues with our friends instead of our parents.
What has been the benefit from this project:
Child: I haven’t talked with my parent in a long time, until today. I have hope that this is the beginning of building a relationship with them and having unity in the family”
Child: “The training we get here looks small, but it has been so important for our human life”
Parent: One parent made the connection between our “Challenge course” (what we call the journey of life) and that falling off the challenge course is like making a big mistake in life. This doesn’t that you children should give up. These are learning experiences that can help you succeed in your future.
And I probably shouldn’t post this one, but this guy’s response gave the whole group a good laugh, He said “Some people peed a little bit at the top of the leap of faith—this shows both the challenges that come in life and also the ability to overcome.”
Parents made us promise to bring them back–and we agreed. They said that they had made more progress in talking to their children in the one-day program than imaginable.